1. |
Pity
03:35
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|
Living up to expectations
Always running, always shaking
Always searching for some piece of mind
Lost in a crowd with no end in sight
All I want, I love
I'd give my life for
Failed, square one, once more
I'm a lost cause
Over work me til I'm through
Never finished, overused
Panicked eyes in the back of the room, I'm
Over worked and never through
Leave me be I'm pulling out my hair
Brain dead but so god damn aware
Constant stress holds on to me
Pity the dead when there's none left living
Tear down the walls
I've done my best
Should I be honest
Or chase success
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2. |
Shallow
01:56
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Conscious is vacant and waiting
For someone to show
Trapped but compliant
Left alone
Give me a chance
Or give it a rest
Keep your distance
I'll stay quiet
I hope you come back to spit on my grave
I hope you hate me for running away
Kill myself off so at least then we're even
Shallow ditch will conceal my demons
I never thought I'd walk this world alone
No future, no past, no holy throne
Burdened by, love received but not returned
Now these letters are burning, this love is
Dead
In the dirt
No solace
No worth
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3. |
Aware And Awake
04:08
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Lost, fade to black
No peace of mind, falling back
Trapped, in my head
I can't wake up, already dead
Stuck, on this earth
No hope for God, no rebirth
Found, no excuse
I lived a lie, I learned the truth
Shed my dead skin
Eyes open, I can't accept
Wandering blinded, knowing why
The light grew dim
Love, a lost dream
Broken promise, swollen leech
Hung out to dry
Fallen helpless, believe the lie
Those three words, don't ring true
Left alone with your will that can't save you
Cling to hope, drown as such
One by one I'll kill off the people I was
Beneath a mountain of dark blue dread
Light can't touch my graying skin
It takes a miracle to get out of bed
Live with resentment
I will join the dead and not be remembered
Aware and awake but I'll have to carry the weight
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4. |
Sleep
01:44
|
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Two months, two months alone
I'm already sick of the person that's grown
Lost in this sea I need no sympathy
Never find rest til my last breath leaves me
I hate myself
I hate what I see
Desperate for help
Death is the only release
Drowning in empathy
Trapped by depression I'll never be free
Disease, broken bones, lost dreams, there's no hope
Kick out the chair watch me swing from the rope
I hate myself
I hate what I see
Desperate for help
Death is the only release
Coward, I thought I could handle this
Just forgive me
Praying for my final breath
Just sleep, just sleep
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5. |
Interlude
04:26
|
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As the days turn to months turn to years, I remain motionless. Unsure of my own desires I settled for complacency as rejection only fanned the flames. But I'm done substituting fantasy for stability. To seek? No, more than that, to create. To build myself into something you could not possibly deserve. To prove to others that I am not a product of my family name. And I've risked so much that failure is no longer and option. On my back ride the hopes of those who lead me from the dark as quickly as I drag them down with me. I refuse to be to my family what you were to me, a cold iron weight that slowly herniated my spine until I could no longer stand straight. I kept my burden a secret, I'm not one to let others worry for me and this icy focus must be what solidifies my resolve. I will succeed or I will take my own life. But it doesn't matter who hears anymore, I'll either end up dead or correct. I hope these words burn away your plastic smile and painted on happiness. I hope I can one day kill what remains of that dead heart of yours. To hell with my own fulfillment, I've found greater purpose outside of myself. I refuse to be what you were to me. I will be better than you. I found solace in the nothingness, I know that my life will end and nothing will change, just a fade to black.
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6. |
Guilt
02:53
|
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God won't answer me
God won't answer me
I prayed for help when your true face showed
I'm going to aim low and die alone
What the fuck's happening to me
You were my everything
I lost all hope and I sold my soul
How do you sleep with the lies you've told?
God won't answer me
God won't answer me
I prayed for help when your true face showed
I'm going to aim low and die alone
No will to start, no end in sight
No void of darkness, no holy light
Just bury me in an unmarked grave
Put me six feet deep and walk away
Give me, give me, a second chance
You did this, you killed me, you caused this pain
I hope to god this guilt will kill you
Eat away your feeble brain
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7. |
Descent
03:13
|
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You've lost your touch
And I've lost my edge
Carve me out just to watch me cave in
On the descent
Crawl to the top
Steady rising won't be enough
Brace yourself just to let me down
Keep me steady, but you'll shove me to the ground
Sear my skin with your Midas touch
Leave me golden, let the fool's gold rust
You left me, on the rocky cliff
Tied my feet, bound my hands, came to finish this
The time has come and gone, it gave it's final breath
Our love just survived to watch its own death
Find me
In motion
In your head
Stranded
|
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